Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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