she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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