Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize