some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
