Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
