I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Walk of Shame today included voting.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Randomize
