I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize