you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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