I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
