we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
