Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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