That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
