Those balls look pretty dangerous.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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