i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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