I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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