He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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