Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
