I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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