i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My vagina is officially offended.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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