Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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