We're like a lot better than the average bears
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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