That's intense
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
