i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
tell your sister to shave her snatch
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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