I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
