i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
