I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
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