IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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