You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
