i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
