she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
