is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
