You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
a search helicopter?!
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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