i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
