Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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