I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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