maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
