that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
