you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
