You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize
