I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
