omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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