I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
