After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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