that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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