her vagine was all disorganized.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
