She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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