Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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