Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
