they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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