Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
